Monday, September 17, 2007

I, Stacey McGill, was a victim of the winter's first snowball; or, BSC #70: Stacey and the Cheerleaders

Yeah, I decided to check out what led to last week's awesomeness. I couldn't find the book immediately following at either of my libraries, so I decided to go in the opposite direction.

Is it just me, or does Stacey actually look thirteen on the cover?


And I think that's supposed to be Charlotte, who's never even mentioned in the book...I have no idea who it could be otherwise, especially since Stacey doesn't actually babysit in this book. [Sweet.]

This book is totally plot-tatastic! What happens? Well, it all starts with RJ Blaser, Stoneybrook Middle School's star basketball player, hitting on Stacey by hitting her with a snowball (talk about mature!). Well, she goes out with him once, and meets all the cool kids (the "Group"). And she totally hits it off with a different basketball player, the infamous Robert. So, they start dating, and Stacey starts hanging out more with the popular kids, including the titular cheerleaders. And when there's an opening on the squad, Stacey auditions. But she doesn't make it, because she's too good and she'll make the others look bad. Oh, and there's this whole thing about the b-ballers and the c-leaders breaking rules and getting special privileges and shit. And Robert quits the basketball team in protest. Oh, and Stacey begins to see the BSC as more and more immature. Whee!

AND there's a subplot, but it's not terribly interesting, and it's a total stretch tying the subplot to the actual plot. See, Shannon's having some issues with her kid sisters. Tiffany has become mean and sullen and bitchy (hmm...something to do with the name perhaps?), and she's torturing their sis Maria. Turns out she's acting out cause Shannon's crazy achiever girl, and Maria's super-swimmer, and Tiff is just a fuck-up (I feel that, sister). But Mary Anne & Claud figure out that she needs a hobby, something that she loves and can actually do. So, flowers and plants. (And Stacey realizes that she doesn't really love being a cheerleader and she doesn't want it for the right reasons. Blah.)

Gimme a L-I-S-T!


  • Since when does SMS have a popular crowd? And why have none of them EVER BEEN MENTIONED BEFORE????!!!!!! How friggin' big is their school anyway, that an entire (pretty sizable) group of kids has never come up before?

  • I hate Stacey's capital letter affectation. You know, "the Group," "McGill Family Drama," "the Big Question," you get the idea. The totally fucking lame idea.

  • Fashion on the first page? Yes, please! Stacey's wearing her "new plum-colored corduroy pants and white down jacket." Yeah, I can picture her in a white puffy coat.

  • Seriously? Multiple guys who are over 6' in 8th grade? Don't think so...

  • "Even I had started going to the games, and I'm no jock." Um, if you were a jock you would be playing a sport. Maybe you might want to rethink that sentence.

  • Stacey thought that RJ was talking about fowls, not fouls. Because she's been smoking Claud's drug of choice?

  • They go to see a movie called Mall Warriors II. It's kinda like Home Alone crossed with Dawn of the Dead. (That's the Romero set at the Monroeville Mall, right?)

  • But when RJ "asks" Stacey out, he says it like this: "Did you see...the movie?...Good. We can see it Friday night. It's playing in town. Okay?" Somebody's a little full of himself.

  • Um, Stacey's trying to say that (one) she's not boy-crazy, but merely "boy-interested" and (two) she's hard-up on the dating front. I call bullshit on both counts.

  • Fuckin' "LUV."

  • Her ridiculously high standards? Get this: "Just a gorgeous, smart, considerate guy who takes my breath away and happens to love me even more than I love him." The fuck?

  • Dude, you're fucking thirteen--maybe lots of LIKE is what you're supposed to have, instead of LUV. You don't want to be that girl that only ever dates and then marries the guy she started dating at 13, do you?

  • Also, Stacey seems a little more interested in dating RJ to get in with the in-crowd than actually dating the guy...Classy!

  • Um, why not just say "likes" instead of this?

  • The phrase "go steady" appears in this book many, many times. I haven't heard that phrase in many, many years.

  • "I know it sounds weird, but I had an urge to go sit with Sheila. The Group seemed to be having such a great time at their table. Besides, boys were there, including RJ." Yep, Stacey's starting to get that itch to leave the BSCers.

  • I really need to read the book where Mal gets mono. Cause I'm really, really curious HOW she got mono.

  • Dawn's back in Cali in this book, and Mary Anne talks about her like she's dead. "Dawn loved blue chips." Sad face, puppy-dog eyes, etc.

  • Claud was wearing "baggy wool men's pants, gathered at the waist by a black leather band [um, I think it's called a belt]; a white tuxedo shirt with rolled-up sleeves; Capezio-type flats with mismatched white and black socks; and a glittery bow-tie barrette in her hair. On someone else, the Look [fuckin' caps again] might be too formal, or just plain weird. On Claudia, it was fabulous." Doesn't sound too terrible, though it's a little Charlie Chaplin for my taste.

  • Okay, RJ actually eats lunch with the BSC one day. Why?

  • Stacey's big date outfit: "a black-and-white plaid unitard with tankstyle top, covered with a black, over-sized cotton knit jersey." I do not understand this outfit at all. And I can think of no more frightening combination of words in English than "plaid unitard."

  • The date with RJ? Kind of a dud. Nothing in common, blah blah blah. But it's better when they run into the Group.

  • She's afraid to tell him about her diabetes. She lets him think she's on a diet. And she lets him make fun of it, too. He's a charmer!

  • Woo!!!! Stacey & RJ run into Sabrina Bouvier at the movies!

  • Actually, RJ's pretty much a dick.

  • Some of the Group make fun of the BSC, and it makes Stacey a little embarrassed.

  • She really notices Robert while on the date with RJ. Like I said, classy!

  • Apparently, Robert sets off a "Cute Alert. Four alarms." Um, cheese alert, all over my keyboard.

  • Not cheesy enough? How about "a smile that should have had a DANGER sign on it."

  • My single favorite part of this book? "I wondered what Corinne was thinking. What would I have thought if I were Corinne? Claud was rummaging around for snacks, wearing an outfit that suddenly seemed a little weird (a sequined vest over a man's white shirt and bell-bottomed spandex pants)." Weird? She's dressed like a reject Fly Girl! Also, Jessi is acting like a four-year-old, though Stacey says she's acting like an eleven-year-old.

  • I didn't realize that the SMS teams were the Chargers.

  • Somebody mocks the BSCers for having a sleepover. Heh. (Rightfully so, at least for calling it a sleepover.)

  • Stacey's always worried that her new, popular friends will make fun of her for hanging with the BSC.

  • The Group have a slang expression that doesn't really make any sense. A "nine-one-one." Yeah..."It's like calling nine-one-one because you're about to die from excitement? You know?" No, bitch, I don't know. That doesn't make any fucking sense. Especially since, used in a sentence, the phrase is used to describe a person. "Robert is a real nine-one-one." So fucking lame.

  • Hee! Stacey's "definitely pretty enough" to be a cheerleader, according to some of the cheerleaders.

  • "I'd never seen real live cheerleaders before I came to Stoneybrook. My school in New York City didn't have them. Cheerleading was frowned on. Girls preferred having their own teams to cheering for the boys." Wow, Stacey went to a progressive school in NY. Also, none of the other schools they played had cheerleaders? She's never been to a pro sports game? Or watched a parade?

  • Stacey really only wants to make the squad because it's the cool thing to do at SMS.

  • This is also the start of Stacey being late to meetings...Because she has better things to do.

  • Stacey hates gym, cause it's in the middle of the day and she gets all gross...um showers? We had showers starting in middle school...

  • "People have the wrong impression, just because they sit together and act like a clique. We sit together and we're not so bad." Thank you, Stacey, for pointing out (though inadvertently) that the BSC are just as exclusive as other cliques.

  • I keep waiting for these girls to realize that you can have separate groups of friends and it's okay. They don't have to get along, and you don't have to hang out with them for the same reasons! Broaden your horizons, girls. Please. I'm bored of your little group dramas.

  • Why does Stacey have Danskins?

  • Jessi's a ballet dancer. Maybe she's not the best person to help you come up with a dance routine for cheerleading tryouts?

  • I want to write for the Connecticut Journal of Hair Disorders. It sounds peer-reviewed. Maybe it'll count toward professional publishing?

  • Stacey's all worried about a "hair kink" before her date with Robert. Yep. And her date outfit? She wears a "pair of new jeans with a brand-new white cotton cardigan with gorgeous floral embroidery and a scalloped, crocheted neckline. On my feet [not again] were suede ankle boots." I can't figure out if she's wearing a shirt under the cardigan or not. Racy?

  • She's blown away, cause Robert wears cologne.

  • Stacey decides to tell Robert about the whole diabetes thing, and he's really understanding. Cause he's perfect, remember?

  • Tonight, in the CAGE OF FURY! MARY ANNE THE MEEK vs. TIFFANY THE TERRIBLE! Oh, wait. It's just Mary Anne's sitting job. Damn.

  • Robert is a cool dancer. A fact which Stacey learns while at a rock concert in Stamford on a date. At thirteen.

  • They double date with Mary Anne and Logan. Why doesn't that keep happening in the next book? It would make sense...

  • Who knew Stacey was a born cheerleader? She's outshines everyone. Big surprise there. These girls never suck at anything.

  • Claud thinks she'll talk Tiffany into being an artist. Way to force your own interests on someone there...

  • There are competing editorials in the SMS paper...one pretty much saying Stacey and Robert are fuckers, and one (by Stacey and Robert) defending themselves. And it's all very out of place.



This lameass ending doesn't even begin to hint at the awesomeness to come.
Weak.

96 comments:

Hali said...

The one where Mallory gets mono is called "Get Well Soon Mallory" or some crap like that. I know because I read it when I was recovering from mono in and I was like "ohmigod one of the BSC member had this too!!"

Anonymous said...

We didn't have showers in middle school gym...or high school gym, for that class. The showers in the locker room were only used by sports team, and even then, we all just showered at home after practice. It wasn't the best if you had gym mid-day, especially in the non-air conditioned school I went to.

And, seriously? A PLAID unitard?

Anonymous said...

I totally don't get why they abandoned the "the girls have other friends" subplots that existed in the first 10 books. Kristy and Mary Anne sat with the Shillaber twins, whatever the fuck they were, and Claudia and Stacey sat with the cool group (i.e. boys).

I loved the mono book, too, when I had mono. I don't think they covered where she got it from. The apparent assumption was that it was the Australian dude; a fact which - surprise! - Mallory vehemently denied.

Angela S. said...

Yeah, we didn't have showers after gym either. I mean, you could, but no one ever did.

I also knew some boys who were at least 6' in junior high, but my town is mostly made up of freakishly tall Northern European stock, so I'm not sure if that's common. I mean, I also knew a couple girls who were about 6' at thirteen, too.

Cat said...

Have you seen the Body Thing?

http://www.aperfectworld.org/page_fourteen.htm

Corey said...

I remember the one where Mal gets mono-that book was responsible for my entire knowledge of the disease up until college, when most of my dorm got it, thanks to one fellow who seemed to carry it.

But Mal doesn't get it from kissing. Because her brothers tease her about it being "the kissing disease," but she didn't kiss anyone. I think maybe she shared a drink with someone?

Um, hi. like the blog. appreciate you re-reading these books, so I don't have to. :)

maylin said...

i loved these last two books you did. it was about time someone realized how lame the bsc was. maybe you should do Kristy's Worst Idea next. i was so excited when i read that book, i thought the whole series was over, but noooo...

puh-leaze. a unitard? a plaid one?
uck.

Margie said...

We HAD showers in gym in middle school, but nobody used them. What eighth grader is actually going to get naked in front of other eighth graders?

Interestingly enough, my middle school was SMS (S for Sunnyvale, not Stoneybrook), and my elementary school's mascot was the Chargers. As in, a plug that goes into a wall with two prongs. WTF.

This book felt more like some sort of weird Sweet Valley crossover than an actual BSC book to me.

KaveDweller said...

We weren't allowed to take showers in my gym class. And even if we could, we had five minutes to change....not exactly a lot of time to shower.

Mal had mono, like, forever. I think it was ten books or something.

Laurie said...

AH! Loved it! I just got done reading this book, which makes reading this somehow better. lol

Anonymous said...

I love your blog. This was one of my favorite books. While Stacy actually looks thirteen in the book, I believe the little girl is actually Jessi who looks way too young to be eleven in the picture, because in the book Jessi helped coach Stacy

Emily said...

That can't be Jessi... cause Jessi isn't white...

Excellent book though!

Sandy said...

Um, nice socks on the cover. The latest I remember those knee-slouch socks was 1993, so the cover "artist" is at least 4 years behind.
And that Body Thing makes me simultaneously want to laugh and vomit.

Anonymous said...

oh geez, i remember this book like the back of my hand.
"STACE AND JESS, SMS, YAYYY TEAM!"

AND, a big lol @ stacey's self-consciousness about her Danskins. whatever happened to shorts and a t-shirt.

Anonymous said...

I'm just trying to wrap my brain around "spandex bellbottoms" My brain is going to explode now.

Rah Rah! said...

Gardening does sound like a great outlet for Tiffany the Terrible. I just hope I'm not around her the day she realizes she lives in Connecticut and that her gardening skills can only be cultivated for about three months out of the year.

greer said...

This is one of all my all-time favorite BSC books. It is definitely weird that none of those kids were ever mentioned previously. I thought the cool kids were like, Austin Bentley and Dorianne Wallingford.

Also? The plaid unitard outfit made me throw up in my mouth a little.

my school also did not have cheerleaders, nor did the schools we played.h

Miriam (a.k.a Poppy Feilds) said...

AHAHA Sabrina Bouvier!

I don’t think I have ever called a sleepover a sleepover…maybe it’s an American thing? But I still had them when I was thirteen. And older.

What are danskins?

Anonymous said...

that scene about the BSC sleepover is the absolute best. kristy blows her whistle at stacey and is like "you coming to the sleepover or what?" hahahaha.

Juliet said...

I'm going to see that plaid unitard in my nightmares

rachel said...

ever since i found out that one of the major ghostwriters of this series was a man, i have been kind of squicked out when reading your outfit descriptions. they just seem a little pervy to me.

"get well soon mallory" is a great book. it's still one of my favorites, and i don't even like mallory. i remember her talking about wanting to burn her pajamas, which totally made sense to me years later when i was stuck in bed after surgery. although if i read it now, i'm sure i would totally want to kill mallory, but back then it was gold.

Tree of Knowledge said...

Tiff, you just made my week. Thanks!

Anonymous said...

Ooooooh, I have never read this one, so thanks for doing it!

And the different groups of friends...I know girls who still can't do it these days. (To borrow a term from the BSC), one of my ex friends just abandoned our group of friends and thought we were pissy because she had two different groups of friends! And then when that group collapsed..she tried to come crawling back. Dummmmmmmmmmmb bitch

We have showers in my high school, in the change rooms, but no one used them. Mostly people used them after swimming in the school pool, but even then no one got nakey, the girls just washed in their bikinis.


Maybe you could do some more of the later books?


:-)


Yay yay rah rah! Cheerleader Stacey, Miss. Skank-a-lot!

Epione said...

It took me so long to get my head around the "nine one one" - it still doesnt make sense!!
Fucking perfect Robert and all the drama about players and cheerleaders missing classes - I was hoping Stacey would turn 'bad'

I remember Mallory getting mono - it was basically her feeling tired, fainting at school, blood tests, finding out it was mono, getting teased by the siblings and realising she cant sit for a long time - gee what a loss.

kiwimusume said...

OhhhhhhhmyGod, I haven't read this book since I was 10!! I wish I'd thought of this book and Stacey vs. the BSC when I was ordering shitloads of BSC and SVH from the US...

I never showered after PE at intermediate school OR high school, in fact I don't think our gyms even had showers. But NZ doesn't get all that hot, so I guess we didn't need them as much. I shudder to think what it would be like to do PE in 35 degree heat (or worse) and not get to shower afterwards.

I'm not surprised we don't hear about the cool group til this book (though IIRC some of them get mentioned a little in the Mary Anne's Makeover and Dawn's First Date.) The BSC doesn't hang out with stuck-up, cliquey people like THEM. :P

Incidentally, wouldn't Cokie and Grace be in this group too? And Shawna McCheaterson? Are there TWO cool groups?

Also, if bitchiness is something to do with the name Tiffany, they should totes have taught her how to snark, because Tiff bitchiness is freaking hilarious to read. Inside Claudia's Room: The Dirty Little Secrets The Baby-sitters Never Wanted Their Readers To Find Out About, anyone?

Eccccch, hate, hate, HATE the stupid picture spelling of "likes". It reminds me of this obnoxious girl in my high school who spelled her name "K8-E". Excuse me while I throw up in my mouth.

OMG I totally remember the Kink (another capital if I remember right?) And now it makes me want to go around singing "Looooola, L-O-L-A Loooooooooola, la-la-la-la-Loooooolaaaaaa...."

Mary Anne The Meek vs. Tiffany The Terrible sounds amusing...

OMG, rachel, for real? That is just...creepy...especially if he's the one who wrote Mary Anne's observations of people "filling out their bikinis"...

Also, I've been sick atm, so yesterday I rewatched the BSC movie. I'm glad it wasn't stomach problems I was sick with, because I totally nearly threw up in my mouth from all the cheesiness. Also, Jessi and Mal looked way younger than 11, and Mal (and several of the kids) looked like she was wearing a wig from somebody's dressing-up box.

I felt wicked sorry for the lady next door. My friend is unfortunate enough to live down the road from a daycare centre, and the noise drives her crazy sometimes. I totes think that neighbour should have done what my friend did the other week, which is yell "SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! THIS IS A FUCKING RESIDENTIAL AREA!!!!!" And this lady had to deal with things being thrown in her garden and her shit being wrecked too - I totally wouldn't have been as quick to forgive as she was.

Also, what the FUCK did they do to Alan?!?!? The motherfuckers changed him from an awesome prankster who never fails to get the bitches' panties in a twist, to this bumbling dork who was falling all over Dawn. Grrrrr.

My verification word is fuxhzksk, lol. Not as good as "IMTWtAT" or whatever it was, but still kinda funny...

Margie said...

angela s--

I was 6'3" at thirteen. There were not very many boys who were six feet, and definitely no other girls. Although there still aren't any girls who are as tall as I am (somewhere between 6'4" and 6'5") after college either. NOT common. Bleh. I have yet to meet any female who is actually taller than I am.

Anonymous said...

Ooh, remember there's still "Stacey's Lie," too. It's a long, hard fall to telling Kristy and Dawn to get bent.

(When I was little, I was all proud of myself for predicting Stacey's "downward spiral. Because I was a very dorky little girl).

Sarah said...

"pair of new jeans with a brand-new white cotton cardigan with gorgeous floral embroidery and a scalloped, crocheted neckline. On my feet [not again] were suede ankle boots."

okay, I wore sweaters like that in grade eight and I was DEFINITELY not considered cool. This is clearly a very different sort of cool crowd...or a ghostwriter who's getting their fashion ideas from the original Degrassi

Anonymous said...

Hey, I've been reading this blog for a few months, and I wanted to finally comment and tell you how incredibly awesome you are. Today I was feeling like shit and was so happy you had a new post because I knew it would make me feel better to read bitchy comments about the BSC I used to wish I could join.

And yes, seriously, a plaid unitard??

Bambi said...

Does anybody remember that her "plum-colored corduroy pants" left purple marks in the snow when she fell (after being hit by RJ's snowball)? Funny how some stuff stays in your head forever...

Btw, RJ Blaser...that name! "blasen" is the german verb for "blow", so "Blaser" would mean someone who blows for a living. Funny ghostwriters...

Didn't the crowd have some great nicknames? The bukeman or something? Blasermeister?

Rianne said...

This blog made me laugh so much!!

I too read all these books years ago!!

We had different covers here in the UK, which had completely different and yet still completely irrelevant pictures!! I think I still have them somewhere in the attic!!

Can't wait to read the next review!!

xXx

colleenn said...

yes! The purple pants leaving a mark in the snow! hehehe.

Also, I hated that nine-one-one saying as well... it always reminded me of this girl I knew in sixth grade who referred to her boyfriend (using that term as loosely as possible because we were, like, 11 or 12) as "CPR" when she wanted a codeword to talk about him on the phone or in school or whatever. Because you'd need CPR after seeing him or something.

Also, Danskins and Capezio-style flats? Do non-dancers wear these brands? I don't think I ever would've heard of Capezio if I hadn't done so much dancing as a kid. Did Suzanne Weyn (of the No Way Ballet series) ghostwrite this book? :)

Anonymous said...

We didn't have showers in middle school... or high school.

I don't get Stacy's unitard outfit... is she wearing pants? Because it sounds like three shirts on top of each other to me... although I'm not caught up on my 80s fashion terms at all.

One thing that pissed me off about this book was one of the cheerleaders said anyone can do a split...lies. All lies...

Anonymous said...

I'm 20 and I still have sleepovers... granted, we don't call them sleepovers, its more like, "Hey, spend the night?" . . . but still. Those bitches are missing out.

katrina said...

ummmm.. so since it has been like 14 years since I was in grade 9, I can admit that my friend had a plaid unitard (but I think we called it a body suit) and I was jealous, because I only had white, black, and one with little flowers all over it.... if we were really feeling stylish we would but a suede (yes suede) vest over the top.....

KaveDweller said...

I reread this recently, and the whole time I was thinking how Logan is always described as a jock (football, baseball, etc), but him and his friends are never part of a cool crowd or get special treatment like the basketball players do in this book? Since when is basketball a bigger deal than football?

Granted, Logan dates Mary Anne, so that would probably lower his cool ratio. But still.

Heidi said...

At my middle school, showers were mandatory. And the towels were seriously dinky, even for 12-year-olds. Think hand-towel size. And you could only use one.

The cheerleaders in my high school were made fun of. They were not the popular girls, but the dorky ones (the football cheerleaders were the worst). The only team anybody wanted to be a cheerleader for was wrestling, because they wore windpants and a windbreaker-type jacket.

To whoever said she found out that one of the ghostwriters was a man, I have something I didn't think I'd ever disclose. I figured I'd prolly get banned from reading the blog or something. My uncle, sci/fi fantasy author, Mel Odom, ghostwrote a few BSC books. When he married my aunt, my mom told me that he had written some so we had something in common (I was reading the books at the time). He had actually met AMM, blah blah blah.
But I don't know which ones he wrote or how many. I was too nervous to ask him.

Donica said...

i refuse to believe that that's charlotte on the coveer, cause it looks nothing like charlotte on any other cover (for oen she has curly hair...and well..she's not real cute!!... oh and she's not even MENTIOEND in the book at all.

We had showers in middle school...but noone used them.

Laura said...

I'm a little ashamed to admit it...i totally had a plaid unitard. Fuck everybody, I thought I was the shit. Although, it was around 1992 and I was about 12 years old, I think I should be forgiven.

by the way, love your blog.

threnody_grey said...

I think this is the first time I've posted here. Tiff, this is the greatest blog, EVER (even better than Pop Candy).

Now that I've gotten that out of the way, I needed some brain bleach after reading about the plaid unitard. So much wrong with that picture. Also, we didn't have showers in middle school. High school, sure, but no one ever used them because they were curtain-/doorless.

@kavedweller:

Basketball was always a bigger deal at my school than football at my high school and my college - mostly because the football team sucked ass. Unfortunately, I was in band so I had to sit through almost all of those excruiating losses. But middle school was all about wrestling and baseball.

Laurie R. said...

When ANM describes so many of the outfit components as "cotton," it drives me crazy, for some reason. More than the time-warps or the repetitious personality descriptions, or the bratty kids...not more than Karen Brewer, though.

Anyone else, or am I insane?






Damn you, cotton.

Lauren said...

"Did Suzanne Weyn (of the No Way Ballet series) ghostwrite this book?"
and here I thought I was the only person in the world that ever read that series! I always figured the three girls in that series were the most ill-matched group of friends ever.

I figure nine-one-one isn't any more ridiculous than "dibbly fresh" ... although both terms are idiotic. ANM really had a knack for coming up with trendy phrases that no human being would actually use!

Stacey's date outfit sounds like something a forty-year-old might wear on a date.

I hated "Get Well Soon, Mallory" but I think it was mostly because of the stupid subplot ... something about all the kids going shopping for Thanksgiving toys? Or something like that?

Anonymous said...

the plot of "Get Well Soon Mallory" was actually kinda cool (imo). The gang (lol) had a Thanksgiving party for the residents at Stoneybrook Manor (the retirement community) who didn't have any family (or were too sick to leave) for Thanksgiving. It was a carnival with games and prizes and stuff. I actually liked this one because the club and kids were actually doing something nice for the community, rather than having another fucking barn talent show.

Anonymous said...

When I read about Stacey's date outfit, I thought "My grandma has a sweater JUST like that!" Geeze, there is no consistancy. Sometimes she wears such "cool" things like glitter nail polish and jelly shoes and JUMPSUITS (why so many effing jumpsuits, anyway) but then for her big date she picks out the most matronly outfit ever?

I started reading BSC when I was in about 2nd or 3rd grade and I remember thinking that the outfits sounded sooooo cool.

Sometimes I would get dressed in the morning and try to describe my own outfits in my mind like they were in a BSC book.

"Purple cotton sweatshirt with a picture of Minnie Mouse on the front over black stirrup pants. On my feet were purple push-down socks that rolled down into three colors, plum, strawberry and blueberry. LA Gear sneakers with pink and silver double glittery laces were over the socks. In my hair was a black velvet headband. Pink platic palm trees dangled from my ears."

Oh, yeah!

Gabbie Perkins said...

Ok, I'm a long-time reader but first-time poster. I LOVE this blog. I was at the end of my BSC stage somewhere in the #40s so I never read this one, but I find the story arc totally entertaining.

I must say though that the whole "suspension of time" deal really got to me after awhile reading these books. How hard would it have been to make them go through the seasons normally? Are we really supposed to believe that Stacey moved back to NYC and then back to Stoneybrook in time for the first snowball fight of the season?? And all the while they've had Mother's Day already that year, Jessi's won a gold medal in some sort of outdoor swimming thing and been in 4 different ballet productions, Kristy's run for President of the student body, they've been on about 16 different trips and Dawn has moved back to Cali and visited about 5 other times? WTF???

Yes, yes, I know it's a whole fictionalized world and I should be more liberal minded about it... but it always seemed weird to me that the books start out when the older girls are 12 and in 7th grade, then they go through the sumer in about 6 books, then all of a sudden we're stuck in this weird world of multiple hallowe'ens and winters. Even as a nine-year-old this bugged me a lot. Just sayin', is all.

Wiki Master said...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Baby-sitters_Club

hee-hee!

Quick, before someone "fixes" it! Cause you know some bitch out there is like, "THAT'S NOT RIGHT! THAT'S NOT WHAT REALLY HAPPENS!"

Jennifer said...

so is a unitard the same thing as a body suit? one of those things with snaps in the crotch? i had a ton of those in 5th and 6th grade. for some reason i picture a unitard as covering the entire body- legs and arms. like she should be performing in cirque de soliel.
lol kristy's life partner, Morbidda Destiny

Rebecca J. said...

Plaid unitard! Noooooooo!

http://www.marcea.com/HH112a.aspx

Anonymous said...

I totally had a plaid bodysuit (it was short-sleeved, though) and I always wore it with a crocheted vest over it! I remember reading a lot of books in the early 90s, though, and thinking how out of style so many of the outfits described were!

Ryan (Yes, I'm Female!) said...

Oh my God, that Wikipedia thing is hilarious! I always wondered how those bitches turned out. . .

I just wanted to say Thank You!! for this fantastic blog. It always cheers me up when I'm in a bad mood. It's funny, I LIVED for these books as a kid and am now deeply enjoying your blog. Awesome.

Oh, and the whole Thanksgiving thing with Mallory when she gets mono is that the entire Pike clan was supposed to go to NYC to watch the Macy's parade from some special bleacher seats, but can't cause good ol' Mal fucks up yet again. Yeah, right, like any sane adults would take THAT many kids on a train, then to a parade (where you know all they'd do is bitch the entire time) and then out to dinner. No one is that much of a masochist.

Ryan (Yes, I'm Female!) said...

P.S. - I'd managed to completely block out all memories of that god awful note with the eye in it. I'm pretty sure this is where my love affair with the BSC ended. Too bad, I'm sure, even at eleven, that I would have enjoyed "Stacey vs. the BSC." It sounds so deliciously awesome!

Anonymous said...

Whenever I see or hear the word "unitard" I think of "retard."

Mary Ann said...

"Does anybody remember that her 'plum-colored corduroy pants' left purple marks in the snow when she fell (after being hit by RJ's snowball)? Funny how some stuff stays in your head forever..."

YES! That was the first thing I thought about when I saw this book had been posted! I swear that my book's cover had a picture of Stacey on the ground having just fallen with a purple skid mark behind her from the pants! AND they always say how Stacey wears the nicest clothes, but how nice could they really be if just touching the snow makes the dye bleed?

This one makes me really want to read "Kristy's Worst Idea" now because I get kind of excited thinking about the BSC falling apart. And I remember reading the book right after that where Claudia goes back to 7th grade, and she was saying that at the meeting they were still not quite comfortable with each other again after their big fight, but I never really found out what happened there... hmmm, now I'm gonna have to go find a copy...

Kimberly said...

I just read this one (thanks to this blog, I've been rereading these ridiculous books). It's one of the best---low on the babysitting and cutesy kids, high on the middle school drama. I'm glad some people in that school are finally making fun of the BSC, because I always found it really hard to believe that as vicious as middle schoolers are, no one ever made fun of them for having a babysitting club or made fun of Claudia's weird outfits, Mary Anne's hair always being in braids, Dawn's hair being butt-length, etc. When I was in middle school, anything that you did that was remotely different was an instant target.

I especially liked the popular girls talking to Stacey about kissing and saying they didn't think any of her friends did that. I guess Mary Anne and Logan keep their hands to themselves during school hours...

kiwimusume said...

OMG!! I've just noticed the PS in that stupid note:

PS: It wasn't an accident. He never misses!

It took me ages to work out that she was actually talking about the snowball...

Anonymous said...

They must've already changed Wikipedia back :( What did it say?

Anonymous said...

The wiki is "fixed." Damn, ANM must pay someone to watch that thing. I can't imagine that there are people out there just randomly wiki-ing BSC.

Bitches!

Tiff said...

I printed out the wiki entry before it was fixed...I'll either scan the good stuff or type it up to share at some point...(I can't make pdfs at work, otherwise I would've done that. Damn shitty work computer.)

Stephanie said...

//"I'd never seen real live cheerleaders before I came to Stoneybrook. My school in New York City didn't have them. Cheerleading was frowned on. Girls preferred having their own teams to cheering for the boys."//

WTF? It sounds like Stacey expected to see cheerleaders at the zoo or something, and is just now encountering cheerleaders in their natural habitat.

I used to be a huge fan of the BSC, and I think the casual, conversational writing style was one of the biggest influences on how I write now. But I've been following this blog for a while, and I suddenly now fear for my sanity knowing that *this* was my primary writing influence for a while. (I do also have the urge to go back through a BSC book and see just how bad it is.)

Looking forward to the next installment!

kiwimusume said...

I just realised that if you have a Wikipedia account you can look at the history of an article, so I made one and had a look. Fucking awesome!!

kiwimusume said...

I've also just posted it in my blog if anyone's interested. :D

http://kakeochi-umai.livejournal.com/233085.html#cutid1

Anonymous said...

if anyone wants to read the edited wikipedia (it's hilarious!)

http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=The_Baby-sitters_Club&diff=158792813&oldid=158628242

thats the link!

KaveDweller said...

Oh wow, I should not have read that at work, my coworkers must think I am crazt because I am laughing at my computer. But seriously.....Stacy dies from a sequence overdose? Kristy marries Morbidda Destiny?

Annie said...

How about "a smile that should have had a DANGER sign on it."

To me, that indicates a pediphile, not a boy in eighth grade...

As for showers, I never had them, either. My junior high simply didn't have them, and my high school had them, but they were decades old, and turning them on was hazardous to your health, so no one did, or was ever expected to.

Reed said...

I looked at the link Cat posted for the plaid unitard, absolutely horrifying and hilarious...

It is fun revisiting these crazy fashions, I remember thinking some of these fashions sounded cool when I was younger (and impressionable)

Michelle said...

Hee! That wiki (and Tiff's blog) is great! By the way Kiwimusume, you had me scratching my head for a bit when you mentioned 35 degrees being so hot--I have to remember we Americans are weird that way with Fahrenheit--35 degrees to you is 1.6666666666666667 celcius degrees to us!

kiwimusume said...

http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=The_Baby-sitters_Club&diff=158792813&oldid=158628242

Oh, they did more than that, they stuck stuff in the existing articles too. It was great. XD Especially what they did to Kristy, Mary Anne and Mallory...

Oh, and sorry Michelle! Shoulda posted both. I meant 95F. ^_^;;

dru_plus_spike said...

Hey, I just discovered this blog from 1bruce1 on Livejournal. You always crack me up.
I bought a copy of the VHS of Dawn and the Haunted House from a used music store. I review it at my blog; http://dru-plus-spike.livejournal.com/124291.html. I thought you'd enjoy it. If you really want to see it, I could probably mail it you.

Anonymous said...

wow
apparently the club did break up eventually. your dream come true!

kiwimusume said...

Hee, I think Mallory's twigged that there's something up with how long they stay in 6th/8th grade, 'cause I was just reading Mallory And The Mystery Diary and she says: "My ninth year went by in a flash. My tenth year went by in a flash. But my eleventh year already feels like a decade long." :P

McGeek said...

Wow, ok so I was a little confused about who Sabrina Bouvier was, but knew the name sounded familiar. I did a google search, and instead of a biography, I found a link to this wonderful little piece. Alas, if only it were actually one of the books. It sure would be nice for those seven missing years to be explained.

http://members3.boardhost.com/bsclegacy/msg/462.html

colleenn said...

Re: kiwimusume--thanks for posting the wiki stuff. I saw the "where are they now" paragraphs originally but must've been too late for the within-the-text edits. :)

And that Mallory comment about her 11th year being a decade long is in Mystery Diary? weird. I definitely don't own and don't think I ever even read that book, and I swear Mallory says the exact same thing in a book I was rereading very recently. I'll have to try to remember what book it was and see how similar the quotes are.

Ali said...

Since Mary Anne is supposedly based off Ann M Martin I sometimes wonder if AMM's middle name is Mary.

I think about this stuff too much.

Anonymous said...

The M stands for Matthews.

Anonymous said...

i am also one of those people who, years afterward, still remembers the purple pants leaving a mark in the snow. i have a pair of dark red cords and every time i put them on i think of that book.

also, i used to do the same thing as a commenter above- describe my outfits in my head like they were in a bsc book- you know, "i decided to go casual that morning, with a red and black zigzag patterned sweatshirt, black leggings, and a sparkly black scrunchy."

pretty effing sad.

Beyond Blond said...

Wow... that edited Wiki had me cracking up. Love it.

First time I've posted on here, but I love the reviews. It's amazing how much I am finding I remember from these books. Also, I never read the later ones, so I had no idea about Stacey's defection... I should have known she was nothing but trouble. Keep the snark coming! :)

Hehe... today's word verification is "fraku." I have no idea why, but that has given me a case of the giggles.

Jenny said...

Holy crap, I think we had the same LA Gear hightops with pink and silver sparkly laces.


God I was stylin.

Krista said...

I always enjoyed this bok because Stacey's plum pants leave a plum-colored print in the snow. Just the thought makes me giggle.

I once had bright pink spandex bell bottoms, my freshman year of high school. In 1997. Oh, the shame. I probably thought they were cool because of fuckin' Claudia.

Amanda said...

I'm sure that is Charlotte on the cover. In a rare moment of continuity in BSC cover art, if you look at the cover of "Little Miss Stoneybrook...and Dawn" the little girl in the blue dress looks exactly like the little girl on this cover. Thus, I believe both girls are Charlotte (although she is rather unfortunate looking - kind of trollish.)

Artemis said...

I haven't read the book yet, but it makes sense that it would be Charlotte. Well, it makes sense if you consider that Charlotte is a Krushers cheerleader, not so much if you actually read the book (Tiff mentioned Charlotte doesn't even appear and Stacey doesn't even do any babysitting).

I always wondered why Charlotte never flipped out and had panic attacks over the cheerleading, considering how shy (nice euphemism, AMM!) she was.

Ryan Michele said...

It WAS the Monroeville Mall, although for years I thought it was South Hills Village. Holla, PGH!

dru_plus_spike said...

Check what I found in the Wikipedia entry about Karen Brewer. You have to scroll down to the bottom, where it says;
"In certain instances, she deliberately disobeys her parents' rules (such as buying toy guns for herself and Andrew in BSLS #65 Karen's Toys) and she has a habit of stretching the truth. And being a horrible....horrible person. In spite of these faults, Karen is still portrayed as a loyal friend and a kind sibling." Ha!

Anonymous said...

Who has the effing time to compile all this info for the BSC wiki sites? (Legit info, I mean, not the good made up stuff--which is much more entertaining btw).

If you read the beginning about Karen, it goes on to speculate what her b-day is, as it is never mentioned specifically in the books. The figure it's sometime mid-April.

The fuck? Who has time for that shit. That means someone had to read every single fucking Karen book to know that her birthday is never mentioned, complile a report, type it up and then post it on wikipedia.

I would like to meet the person who took the time to do that just so I can punch them in the face for being such a loser fucktard.

And, when someone fucks with the "real" info, the person must actually go back and change it, which means they probably check the entries several times a day.

Double loser fucktard! I'm going to punch them twice for that.

Sarah said...

You said:

"...I hate Stacey's capital letter affectation. You know, "the Group," "McGill Family Drama," "the Big Question," you get the idea. The totally fucking lame idea..."

and I say:

"...You are So Fucking Right..."

Anonymous said...

Wow, anon @ 4:33, why all the anger? It's only fictional Karen Brewer we're talking about. Jeez.

greer said...

4real. you're the one who is wasting your time BITCHING about the karen wiki entry attempt to actually function as a wiki entry, anon@4.33--while reading a bsc website, no less.

Anonymous said...

It actually took me like three reads to figure out that that girl was saying "RJ Likes You." HATE!!!!!

What's up with all the jumpsuits and unitards? I don't imagine that they're all that fashionable.

Alice said...

I LOVE this book so much. I especially love her date with RJ and how he makes fun of her for ordering diet soda and getting regular popcorn and not getting carmel corn... what movie theatre serves carmel corn???

bazu said...

black and white plaid unitard?

uh, two words: freddie mercury

http://www.queenzone.com/queenzone/mp3.aspx?Q=15446

Anonymous said...

I went to a NYC private school, and we didn't have cheerleaders. Neither did any of the other schools we ever played.
We also didn't have showers in gym, but again, small NYC school. SMS should have better.

Anonymous said...

Get Well Soon Mallory made me laugh soooooooo hard at Mallory's misery. It seriously cracked me up... ahh... good times...

Anonymous said...

"I, Stacey McGill, was a victim of the winter's first snowball" OH.MY.GOSH. What a HONOUR!

Calid said...

im so confused! i dont even understand what jumpsuits are! (sad face)

Anonymous said...

if she's hard up on the dating scene at only 13, she's gonna have some serious problems as a young adult.....

Anonymous said...

Stacey is so excited about getting the cheerleading results, that in class 2 teachers ask if shes having a diabetic reaction..... Riiiightt.... How embarrassing:

teacher: Oh noes! Stacey McGill are you having a diabetic reaction!!!!???????

Stacey: Um... nooo.

I don't know. That seems embarrassing to me.

metamorphstorm said...

Unfortunately, it's never mentioned how Mal got the mono. And considering that she looks like "a ripe, hairy tomato" as actually mentioned in one of the books, I don't see how she ended up getting kissed. AT ALL.

Heh. This blog brings forth my sarcasm. And it's fun. And people avoid me for three days after I read these... :D